Why? Because I thought I was seriously making plans into actions. Plans turning gears and wheels into motions. Motions into, maybe, something else. Heck, I almost threw everything to the pit of despair to get my unnerving self to talk myself into this.
Now I (think I) know better. Funny. I said that the last time I was hit this hard. It was bordering true shit. I can't even fathom why I even tried to invest resources on that.
Gahhh. I made elaborate plans. Plans that I never thought my mind can conjure but I did! And, boy, was I close to executing them! Hit me hard now rather later so I can reel back and ground myself to reality.
So why even bother now? I won't.
*downs imaginary shot and fills another round*
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