It's been a while

It's been a while since I had a good brain fart. Or brain diarrhea.

I need to de-clog this shitty organ before it poisons itself with all the toxic shit it's been thinking and processing. Guess I have to start with the most toxic: You.

I know, it's old news. Almost-a-year-kind-of-old, but still news. Heck, you just made headlines a few months back. That Jericho's-walls-are-tumbling-down kind of headlines is enough to shock me to the core, let alone that our-relationship-was-terrible and that adamant NO. Well, I guess I've found the closure I've been looking for. The closure without having the need to see you personally (and sneak in a punch or two). Just like any wound, it will heal. Maybe bleed a bit if I scratch it (which I do, some times - i.e. inebriated, uninhibited), but eventually it will heal. Leave a scar, maybe. Heck, I'm a keloid-former so it will sure leave it's mark. But no matter how the whole shenanigan got me through a rollercoaster of an experience (fuck, it's just seven months and look what it did to me HAHA), I'm still thankful that I am going through (and hopefully, gone) it. Maybe ride it again? Not in the near future. And not with you, I hope. You've done enough damage to my psyche, I can't go out with other people without leveling to your (sub)standards. You've done your bit of good and I don't want any of it. Just make sure you make the right choices for yourself and stay happy, kiddo. Stay happy.

Then there's work. Hello, Work. So far, you've been good to me. Except for that one night shift I was floated to the Central ICU, which grounded me back to the reality that my profession deals with Death at a daily basis. It may not be in my shift, or under my care, but the Scythe of Death hovers above our partners in care - patients - waiting for its next victim.

I guess my brain emesis was cut short with Tita Adele's 'upbeat' tunes. Damn. I should have left out her '25' out of the playlist for maximum feels. Guess til my next massive brain fart!