By the time I hit the 'Publish' button for this post, it would be a monumental success for my tear-crusted eyes. This is my eulogy for the best friend that God has given me: Rambo Jay Biblanias Sison. He is more than a dog to a human, a pet to a master, a buddy for a friend. Rambo is a brother to me. For more than 10 years (11 in a few days time), he has provided the household constant happiness with his bubbly canine nature along with the unnerving sensation when his aggressiveness decides to manifest itself. The joyous moments when he makes everything feel so OK and the nerve-wracking moments when Dad once decided to put him to sleep because Rambo has had enough with his biting spree. I remembered bawling my eyes out whenever my father would tell us that Rambo's buyer is just outside to get him. I might be a kid then but if he decides to leave us now, I would not hesitate to break down in tears wherever I am, whenever it would be. You will always be a part of the family and therefore holds a special part deep in my heart. You will be missed. Very much.
As I try to put a (temporary) closure to this entry, I dread the moment of the publication of this post. It would be very heartbreaking, at the very least. I do hope I can get over the pain of such a loss. I will try to update this daily as much as possible. Counting down, perhaps, the last days of Rambo in this mortal plane.
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Losing someone whom you've cared for very much is a rare experience for me. Last time that I experienced this emotion was when the only grandmother I came to know passed away. I was just 12 years old back then and I wasn't able to attend her funeral for some circumstances. When I watched the video coverage of the funeral and the burial, tears just started to spill and they raced down my cheeks while my heart starts to crumble in the face of the inevitable. Back to present day, Rambo's aged frame of a body is starting to fail him. A walk of a few meters is a heart-wrenching scene to see, let alone a walk outside. Every trembling step puts me in the edge. All I can do is to aid his every step and seeing him this weak breaks me. Brings me back to that whimpering kid that cries every time his father kids him about his dog being sold.
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It's 3 in the morning and and he gave us a scare. A whimper roused us from our deepest slumber as we have to attend to his needs. His beyond recovery. We all know it's almost time. The past week, I gave him an optimistic month to live. Yesterday, an optimistic week. But now, an optimistic 24 hours is more than enough for him to say his goodbyes. Seeing how much he has already suffered, I just break down and ask him that it's OK to leave (at least, for me). Since yesterday, I've been on his side, trying to comfort him while uttering silent prayers. It's been quite a while since I last cried and it felt good getting out all these emotions. Still reading? Can't believe you follow me until this moment. Thank you for being an invisible shoulder to cry on. I just don't know where else to turn. I guess until the next post.
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Consummatum est.
Requiescat in pace
Rambo Jay Biblanias Sison
May 19, 2001-June 5, 2012
Errata: he's currently 12 years old. Exactly two weeks from now and he could have been 12 years and 1 month old. Be a good dog Up there, will ya! :')
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