Have you ever been in a one-sided relationship? Worse part of it is that you're in the lover end without being loved back? Have you ever been in a situation where you kept leaving messages in his chatbox, only to be replied with 'Seen's? Or if Fate's at your side, a cold one-word reply wanting the end of the conversation as soon as it started. I am in one right now for three days now. Four more. And I don't think I can put up with it any longer.
Sending Seen messages feels like talking to a comatose patient. You're heard but not replied. The painful thing about it is that they - unlike coma patients - have the ability to talk back to you. That not replying to you is a conscious choice in their part. And that fucks me up. Big time.
They say you can only love so much before you stop doing so. I don't want to reach my limit and to stop loving you. You keep on pushing me away but I'll do my best to hold on tighter, even at my own expense. But, akin to the saying, I can only hold on so much. I can only abandon myself so far before turning back. I can only love you so much.
I thought we were in this together. After all the hiccups we've been through, I thought we were a stronger couple. A bond not even Thor's Mjölnir can break. It was all but a fool's dream. And ours was the best dream this fool has ever thought of.
Thank you for making me realize that someone like me has the capacity for love. And to be loved, even for a brief period of time. Thank you for opening my eyes and expanding my horizon. Thank you for making me feel emotions that I never thought this fool's heart can even muster. But I won't say thank you for slowly breaking my heart. I am not that fool enough to thank a person who makes him feel unworthy. But fool enough to keep hoping that you will still deem me worthy.
I'll keep holding on. Until I can.
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